I’ll just tell you guys like it is - I am stressed to the max. Last night I sat in front of the computer for three hours and couldn’t will my brain to come up with a coherent post. I’ve never had writer’s block in my life, and it really disturbs me that my personal chaos is causing it now. So instead of something that might actually be useful, today you get to read my random thoughts.
The job situation.
Yesterday I got a call about a job I applied for back in the summer. Would I like to come interview? “Oh yes, I’d love to interview!” I chirped. What. The. Hell. Why did I schedule an interview for a job I don’t even want? Because I feel like I have to. What kind of person quits a job without another one to go to, THEN turns down an interview? Apparently me, because I called this morning to cancel it.
The thing is, I don’t want this job. It’s 30 minutes from home, the pay sucks (as in less than I’ve ever made in my working life), and the hours don’t work. Sure, it would somewhat pay the bills for awhile, but I’d end up pissed off and frustrated all over again.
My life in song.
This is so nerdy, but sometimes I make important life decisions based on songs. For example, this morning I was freaking out in the car, wondering if I’m stupid not to interview for that job. Stress is making me doubt myself, and I started thinking, There’s no way I can make it doing any kind of writing. I need to realize that and move on. So I decided to let my iPod clear up the confusion for me. I plugged it into the auxiliary jack in the car and told myself, The first song to come on will tell me what I should do.
No joke: I hit Shuffle, and the first song was Jonny Lang’s “There’s Got To Be A Change.”
I know it’s dumb to take that as any kind of sign, but I really did. I’m not going to apply for jobs right now. I’ll make it through my notice period (hopefully without committing any felonies) and see what I can do. I’m not dumb enough to think my plan is too great to fail, but I at least want the opportunity to find out.
Someone please tell me I’m not the only one who lets music determine my destiny.
I wish I invented World of Warcraft.
Jayden asked me if he could start playing WoW. I know NOTHING about it, except that people get addicted to it. So I did some research and found out that there are parental controls, and I was thinking I’d let him try it out. Then I found out it costs like $15 a month just to play.
$15 a month for a stupid game? According to the interwebs, over 11 million people play WoW. So that’s $165 million. A MONTH. Not counting the money people spend on in-game upgrades and whatever else is available. Like I said, I don’t know anything about the game, but I’m sure the creators were smart enough to include all kinds of ways to spend more money.
What if the government charged everyone $15 a month for….oh, I don’t know, the privilege of NOT going to jail or something? They could invent an online game and everyone who pays gains access. We could pay off the national debt at a rate of nearly $2 billion per year, just with 11 million people paying in. I wouldn’t mind contributing to something like that if I knew the money would actually be used for good.
Jay and one of his friends have been making up characters and realms for the online game they say they want to create one day. I told him this morning to MAKE IT HAPPEN. Someday I’m going to be old, and I’d like to wrinkle in style.
My ex-husband is still an idiot.
I think I mentioned that the ex got fired from his job a few weeks ago. I was surprised at how panicky he was - not that most people wouldn’t panic in that situation, but this was excessive. Then on Sunday, he asked to talk to me when he brought Jay home. I’m thinking he wanted some free therapy regarding the job situation, so I said okay.
Um, no. Turns out he’s back in the payday loan cycle and owed $600. By the next day. Could I “loan” him the money?
I LOLed. Here I am, leaving the world of gainful employment for something that could possibly render me homeless, and he thinks I’m going to hand him $600? Knowing I would never get the money back? Puh-lease.
Okay, that’s about all I know today. What about you guys? Any random thoughts for the day?
Oh yeah, here’s what two of my dogs were doing last night while I was battling writer’s block:
They like to keep me company, even when I’m useless.